This week, Parker congratulates Frisbie for being a champion, which seems to sour his mood. Frisbie gets some mail that leads to a disagreement about who the villains of the world are, as well as disagreements about the subtext of the "Die Hard" movies and Konami video games. Then, Parker reveals his plan to settle the abortion debate once and for all.
In the Lightning Round, the question is raised: Will there be a gay James Bond? No, says James Bond. LA residents ask: "Where's the Beef," and Ugandans are getting a special Christmas present!
Music: "Ass n Twin Peaks" by DJ Edgar Hoover
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